Tuesday, June 22, 2010

730 days ago.......

today was the last time I heard my mom tell me with her sweet eyes closed, laying in her hospital bed, how much she loved me for the last time. Oh what I'd give to hear her voice just one more time, to have a conversation with her.....anything. For those of you who read my blog and have lost someone as close to you as I was to my mom know exactly how I feel. I wouldn't wish this pain upon anyone. It is like you have a permanent hole in your heart, a piece of you is missing. My best friend in the whole world is in heaven and heaven is so lucky to have her there. The only thing that keeps me sane and going on without her on this earth with me is knowing she is pain free and that I will see her again. I can't wait for that day when I can hold her in my arms again. For those of you who are lucky enough to have your mom a phone call away or just living down the street, consider yourself blessed beyond belief!! Don't take one minute for granted. Daughters are just not meant to be without their mothers. Life is so short, you never know when a loved one is going to be called up to heaven. Don't waste another minute.......be sure and always tell your loved ones how much you love them and live like it is your last day on earth. Losing my mom has taught me so much. Time is so precious and you can never get it back, so please use it wisely. I wish I could say that it gets easier with time, that is the saying right??....Well, so far for me it has only gotten harder. I still get teared up and cry often with just merely mentioning my mom....so I am still grieving and probably always will be. Even though I still cry talking about her, it feels so good to talk about her and remember all the wonderful memories I have of her. It makes me feel like she is right there with me. She is such an inspiration and example to me. She is my best friend in the world.........I LOVE YOU MOM!!!!

4 comments:

Kristine said...

We are heading up to Chad's mom's grave tomorrow. I know it is going to be hard. I enjoy each and every time we visit. I feel like I am able to talk with her. It will be harder for Chad as he has not been there for 2 years. It will be 4 yrs in December since we lost her and it does not get easier. I lose it every time we sing "Oh my Father' at church because we sang it at her funeral. To top things off each year since they choose that song on Mothers Day. I just leave to be alone while everyone else sings. Hang in there, she is doing AMAZING work on the other side.

Jennifer Darger said...

I've been missing my Dad lately, Dads always know how to take care of everything and make it ok. Wish he could make everything ok right now... So sorry for your heartache. I love you.

Mason clan 5 said...

You made me cry. You mom was such a sweet spirt. My thought and prayers are with you. I couldn't imagine without my mother. Call me if you every need anything.

Melissa and Allen said...

I thought about you a few days ago and remembered it was this time of year 2 years ago. I am so sorry- i can't even imagine how hard it must be and I am sorry it's getting harder. I love and miss you!